AISHA'S STORY
In 1994, I travelled to Israel for three
weeks and found it very interesting. The next year, I went again, but this
time, my curiosity was awakened as regards the troubles between the
Israelis and Palestinians. I was also confused about the 1967 and 1973
wars Israel had with its neighbours. On my return to Iceland, my oldest
son asked me if I could find him a job in Israel and I did. He got work at
a hotel in Eilat.
Around nine months later, I visited him and found him
with a very good job and a nice salary. But he was not happy. He told me
he was very angry at the Israelis. I was very surprised because at this
time I really thought they were the good guys, but then my son told me
about the differences Israelis make between Jews and the others, i.e. the
Arabs, Muslim or Christian. He explained to me, for example, that he, as a
foreign young man, a European, was after a very short time put in a job
with a lot of power, and at the same time, Arabs that had been working
there for years were treated as slaves, as subhuman. He had been told that
he needed to be hard on Arabs, treat them like slaves, because, as the
Israelis put it, they were lazy. But he had found his Arab friends to be
very nice, polite, extremely generous and good, hard workers.
In the end, he moved from his comfortable flat in the
hotel to their housing, which consisted of just tents and shacks! Their
place was far from as nice as what he had been used to, but he wanted to
be with them because there, he had found real friends.
This was a turning point in my
life. I have not been to Israel again. And I refuse to go there until it
is Palestine. But I have been able to visit, live and study various Muslim
countries.
At forty, after raising four sons, I
finished my studies, my baccalaureate, so I would be able to go to
university. I wanted to study Middle East studies and Islam. Before I went
to Denmark to study at Copenhagen University, I tried very hard here in
Iceland to find any book about these issues. But I did not succeed. No
Qur'ān, nothing at all. But when I had birthday, I was asked what I
wanted for a present. I answered: the Qur'ān. It was nearly
impossible to find. But finally an antique bookshop found it for me so the
next step was to start to read. This was the year 1989. I had got "The
Book." This was the greatest gift I have ever received.
In 1991, I went to Copenhagen and
everyone said that I was crazy. What was a woman over forty doing, leaving
her home to study Arabic and Islam? And still today I hear this! Some of
my friends left me because of this. Not because I was trying to tell them
about Islam, but because I was not normal in their minds. But nothing
could stop me.
After two years studying in
Denmark, I went to Cairo, to learn better Arabic and to study Islam. I was
very lucky to find a professor from the Al-Azhar University. Starting in
1993, he taught me all about the Qur'ān, from the beginning to the
end. Soon after we began, I told him that I wanted to change my religion
and he always said, “you don't need to do that because we have enough
Muslim." After nearly two years of study, he suddenly asked me if I
still wanted to convert. I said yes, I did. He then said I was ready. In
fact, I was already a Muslim. He found time in the Al-Azhar University and
I became Muslim on 30 January 1995. It was, and still remains, the
happiest day in my life. Only Muslims know this feeling.
Then I returned to Iceland, where the
situation today is not at all as it should be. Over the last ten years,
many Muslims have moved to Iceland and live here today with a family. Many
have married Icelandic women, who in some cases have become Muslims. They
are often not Arabic speaking, so the children have problems with the
Arabic language. I see this is very sad, because the basis of their
religion, Islam, is in Arabic: the Qur’ān. I believe there should
be free education available for these children and even their parents. Of
course, there should also be teaching in the Qur’ān and in Islam. I
also miss the possibility of listening to a teacher explain the Qur’ān
and the Hadith. If we live in an Arabic country, we can turn on the
television, go to the mosque, or go to any cultural centre, ask questions,
get answers, and learn. We need a teacher, an Imam, or an Imama.
I want to mention the Icelandic
people. They are open about things that they already know, but when it
comes to things like Islam, I find them in fear. They know Islam is a
religion and the God is called Allah, but they believe Allah is another
God, a Muslim God. And they know the men can marry four wives. That's
about it. The fear is clear when they meet somebody like me. When I say
that I am a Muslim, they ask me if I am in the Osama Bin Laden group. They
ask me how, as a woman, I can dream of having this religion where women
have no rights, and no power.
But the saddest thing is that they don’t want to
listen or hear anything, because all they know is from films on the
television about terrorists, fundamentalists, extremists, etc. all the
negative things. In my case, I have learned to be patient with other
people and I have chosen in many cases not to mention that I am a Muslim.
If we had an active group of Muslims here, a network working for Islam, we
would be able to empower ourselves, make plans to inform Icelanders with
the right information and in the right way.
Here in Iceland, we have
Allah’s power everywhere, more than in many places in the world. We have
icebergs, very old, creeping down from the glaciers, geysers, volcanoes,
strong rivers, big waterfalls, earthquakes and strikingly beautiful
nature. When I travel around my country, I often say, without realising it,
Subhān Allah. Here, on a daily basis, we can see very clearly
Allah’s great work.
It is very difficult to be a Muslim in
Iceland as it is right now. As a single Muslim woman, I have really no
place to go to meet other Muslims. Not even a shop. In Denmark, there are
shops of all kinds, mosques, etc. Even to be able to go to the butcher,
speaking a mix of Arabic-Danish makes you feel relaxed. Not to mention the
bookshops! Somehow these things give you a feeling for Islam.
Because I feel lonely in my
religion, I find it very important to pray and read the Qur’ān. Not
because I wouldn’t do it otherwise, just that it becomes more important.
It is too easy to forget when you live in such a different country, and
you feel you are alone. I sometimes think about the young Muslims, coming
here for work or whatever. Not all of them were raised in religious
families in their homelands and then it is easy for them to forget or get
careless. The negative atmosphere about Islam has a big influence on young
people. I think it is easier for me as a grown up woman and a recent
convert to remember my duties in my religion.
If I say I don’t eat pork, I am
asked why and it depends on the situation which answer I most prefer:
whether I tell them that I am a Muslim. I don’t mind anymore about the
responses, but if I have the feeling there could come very negative
comments, I don’t say I'm a Muslim. Sometimes the comments are very
hurting, because they will not listen to any explanations and I feel very
sad hearing this about my religion. It is as if somebody says very bad
things about your family, which you know are untrue, only the lies said
about Islam hurt even more.
I once heard a story about a man, living
on a small island. He had met some Muslims and they told him about Allah
and the Qur’ān. He got very impressed and became a Muslim. Years
passed and he continued to be alone on his island, praying every day, five
times. But as the years went by, he forgot the exact words in the prayer.
Still he prayed as always until finally, the only thing he could remember
was Allah. Sometimes I find I have something in common with this man. Even
though I know the prayers, I find myself alone as he was.
Reykjavík, June 2004
© Aisha, oktober 2004
